We all have saboteurs. They show up as shame, fear, self-doubt, unhealthy relationships, and even our own voices telling us we’re not enough. But what happens when those saboteurs are not just internal—but walking, talking people who smile in your face and betray you behind your back?

I know what it’s like to be sabotaged by others—and by myself.

After almost 40 years of marriage to a pastor, I believed I had built a life rooted in faith, love, and purpose. But when betrayal came from the very people I served, my world fell apart. I lost my marriage, my home of 29 years, and my identity in one devastating season. I went from being the “First Lady” of a church to being homeless and heartbroken.

In the ruins of that life, I craved comfort, connection, and validation. That desperation led me into an abusive relationship at the tender age of 62—a place I never imagined I’d be. The physical, emotional, and psychological abuse I endured in that season was another form of sabotage—one that preyed on the grief and vulnerability I carried.

Then came incarceration. The trauma that had been building for years erupted into a life-altering experience that most people wouldn’t survive. But I did. Not because I’m superhuman, but because I decided the saboteurs—internal and external—would not have the final word.

Here’s what I’ve learned about fighting the saboteurs of your life:

1. Recognize Them – Whether it’s a toxic partner, a manipulative church leader, or your own negative self-talk, you have to name what’s harming you. You can’t fight what you refuse to see.
2. Heal Loudly – I refuse to heal in silence anymore. Sharing your truth is a powerful weapon against shame. Every time I speak, I reclaim a part of myself that was stolen.
3. Rebuild Intentionally – After trauma, you don’t “bounce back”—you build forward. I rebuilt my life not by trying to be who I was, but by becoming who I was meant to be: a trauma-informed keynote speaker, an advocate, a survivor who thrives.
4. Set Holy Boundaries – Boundaries are not just healthy; they are holy. I’ve learned to protect my peace like my life depends on it—because it does.
5. Forgive Strategically – Forgiveness isn’t about letting people off the hook; it’s about releasing yourself from the grip of resentment. I forgive, not to forget, but to free myself.

If you’re reading this and feeling the weight of your own saboteurs, I want you to know—you’re not crazy, weak, or broken. You’re human. And you’re worthy of healing, no matter how many times you’ve had to start over.

I’ve started over more times than I can count. But each time, I come back wiser, stronger, and more grounded in truth.

You can, too.

The saboteurs don’t win. You do.

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Let’s Connect!

I now speak, write, and advocate as a trauma-informed voice for those who’ve lived through the unthinkable. If you’re looking for a keynote speaker, workshop leader, or collaborator who speaks from lived experience—I’d love to connect.

Contact:
https://denysehturner.com/keynotes for Speaking Inquiries OR email: letschat@ladydrdenyse.com

#TraumaHealing #Resilience #KeynoteSpeaker #WomensVoices #MentalHealth #OvercomingAdversity #RebuildingLife #HealingJourney

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Dr. Denyse H. Turner, CEO,
Triumphant Grace Enterprises Mental Health Strategist – Trauma Focus and Psychosocial Support Specialist
Christian Educator, Ministry Developer, International Public Speaker, Author/Writer/Ghostwriter, Coach/Counselor, Trainer, Seminar/Workshop Leader, Virtual Trauma Conference^© Host, and Group Event Planner
Phone: 855-549-3894
Email: letschat@ladydrdenyse.com
Web: https://ladydrdenyse.com